Let’s talk about that stupid fucking ice bucket challenge. Yup, I called it stupid. I really cannot stand this whole thing. This is one if those things that sort of took off, because we’ve become a total meme culture that has to follow something because someone (usually their favorite celebrity, because nothing matters more to so many people these days than what the celebs “care” about) else does it. Think about what this thing is. You’re nominated by someone and either donate $100 to an ALS charity or you dump a fucking bucket of water and ice on yourself. Basically, it’s a bully move dressed up as philanthropy. I thought this started as a whole “wouldn’t you rather give us some money rather than be doused in ice cold water? Come on, buddy, you know you want to stay dry ;)” until it took off as this whole “Haha look at me. I was up to it. Aren’t you?”

Fuck all of you. I am so turned off by this, because it’s a whole social bullying thing now. Aren’t most if your friends on Facebook berating anyone who thinks that the challenge is dumb, or complains about water being wasted, or whatever? I’ve seen more than a few of mine do it. This is philanthropy at its absolute worst.

I ow my opinion on this is unpopular. I also know that ALS is a serious disease. I am also sure that the ALS charities are better charities to donate to than a charity like Susan G Komen. I’m sure these charities do important work. But this peer pressure campaign rubs me the absolute wrong way. Let me choose where I want to donate my money. Or, better yet, let’s take some of this energy and use it to pressure world governments to actually pony up their money and resources to try and cure this disease. Until then, take your ice bucket and fall in it.

Photo Credit: MSNBC

So let me explain something about driving on roads in the great state of New Jersey. If your license plate looks like this:

Or this:

You need to understand a key concept about driving on our highways. Do not just sit in the left lane and go at or under the speed limit. It’s that simple. First of all, doing that is actually illegal. Maybe you’ve never noticed these signs on the highway, but they have an important meaning:

It means don’t get in the left lane and just drive 65. People want to get by you. You can get a ticket for that shit. Yet none of you goddamn out of state drivers learn this shit. Maybe it’s the third lane most of our highways have. Maybe it’s the fact that our roads actually move, unlike any highway in the City. I don’t know. Either way, get out of the left lane and let the rest of us go by.

(Header photo credit: Dougtone on Flickr. Licensed under a CC by-sa license)

It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that this year marks fifteen years since I graduated from high school. Fifteen. I’m really old enough to say something like that. It’s just one of the many things that are falling into the “it’s been that long?” category for me these days. Movies, TV shows, music I like, all sorts of stuff. It’s crazy to hear a song I like and realize that it’s twenty fucking years old. It’s crazy because it’s one of those things where you wake up one day and realize that it’s fifteen, twenty years later. I remember going to so many movies with my best friend when we were in high school, and that was over fifteen years ago. I woke up one day and I was in my thirties. How did that happen? I don’t always feel that grown up, but here I am, a month or so from turning 33 and paying bills and rent and a car payment and such. You’re right where your parents were when you were a teenager going “I remember when I was your age and the Beatles and the Rolling Stones were brand new”. It’s mind blowing really. Blink and you miss it. All of it. Then you realize that time keeps on slippin… slippin… and, well, you know how that story goes.

PS – enjoy the trip in the wayback machine that my friend Jen found for me a few months back and shared with me on Facebook in the featured image for this post. The fun part (or is it sad? I’m not sure) is that I look pretty much the same. Bit older, bit fatter, but that’s still me. Seriously, mind blowing.

(Honest truth: I don’t think I’ll be going all Grey’s Anatomy on you and naming every post after a song when I write a post like they name every episode after a song.  Thing is, when I was thinking about the general theme to this post, that stupid line from that Steve Miller Band song kept playing in my head, so I had to roll with it) — totally lied. Going with the song titles thing. I can’t help myself.